It is tempting to describe a guest list as data. It is more accurate, and more useful, to describe it as permission — and permission behaves differently from data. It expires. It narrows when it is misused. It cannot be bought back once spent.
Which is why value comes first
A guest who has already received something is being asked to continue an exchange. A guest who has received nothing is being asked to start one on trust. The second ask is much larger, and it is the one most systems make.
The same logic governs how a reward explains itself. "Because you love the hummus" reads as attention. The same offer with no reason attached reads as surveillance, and it costs permission rather than earning it.